-If I was studying medicine now, I know for sure what I wanna specialize in. A psychiatrist.
-A criminal one would be cool. I find myself constantly wondering and analyzing about the actions and the mind of the human.
-But another part of me objects to the many assumptions of science: having your own brother diagnosed with ADHD and prescribed suppressive drugs don't help boost my personal opinion on psychiatrists.
-perhaps we have to find a holistic way of solving the problem. The root of the problem.
-which for me, I personally believe that Christ, and the power of the human touch, is the answer.
-of which, if I was studying medicine right now, I know I'll make a lousy psychiatrist.
-I would have to think more of ways to revolutionize the ways of medicine, a solution that reaches far beyond oral suppressants and pep talks.
-that of course, would be really challenging and appealing to me, but
-of course that may bring success, not fulfillment.
-and I, being a person of simple pleasures, would choose happiness over success.
-looking at pop sitting on the couch,
-he's a successful man. a man who's probly considered as one of the most inspiring leaders who's inspired others to be leaders.
-when you try to talk to him, it's most likely that his mind is elsewhere.
-it reminds me of myself. and i ask, do I want to be like that someday.
-more importantly, would any man leave me if I turned out like that some day?
-mom doesn't like me to think so much of this.
-maybe I shouldn't. No matter how much I stew my thoughts,
-no matter how much I strategize, my fate is not my own.
-because no matter how much you try, you can't control love.
-you can be friends, make the first move, look good, show the best of yourself,
-but you cannot be totally sure that the one you have your eye's on is going to stay interested.
-I can now honestly tell myself that I haven't the capacity to work on a relationship.
-I am frustratingly self-centered. It's a disease. It makes me say things that I don't mean, do things I don't mean to do.
-and the more I stew, I know there's so much to do: get a car, a job, manage my house, manage my social life, see the world, all in a bid to attain enough confidence and self-suffciency to prove to myself to be the best I can.
-but the more I look at others, the more I think this: she didn't have to work to get into a relationship, why should I?
-its a circular argument, you see. I'm arguing with myself. Arguing with God.
-I've finally gotten into the heart of the matter.
-firstly, I do not know what I need. I realise now that I am after instant gratification. Throw me a bf right now, I do not think I will be able to be what he needs, as I am an extremely selfish person.
-secondly. I am afraid to surrender to God's will.
-And lastly. I do not like to wait.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Something Sien To Do durin' the Summer Hols
As some of you all know, holidays are a marvelous way to:
1) Pig out and parasite in your parent's home
2) Buy and hoad all the stuffs you can get to smuggle back to Aust, the Land Where Everything Is Expensive.
3) Abandon your blog.
4) Be totally antisocial.
5) Be a social butterfly.
6) Speak all the broken English all you want.
You get the idea.
I, for one have accepted a challenge from a dear dear friend who's obsessed with her weight.
Thus we get to LOSE WEIGHT during our holidays!!
But seriously this is playing way outta my favor.
Firstly I have to go through Christmas.
Then a trip to America, where its is FREEZING cold there, as its Summer in Aust, thus the Winter there.
And in Winter, you GET FAT.
Don't even think of what those crap the mags tell you about losing weight in winter.
Aaaaaand....there's CNY!!!!
See? No hope liao.
and my friend is spending her hols in Aust, where she can focus without undue distraction.
NO FAIR!!!!!!!!!
On a happy note though, I have the advantage of family support such as:
1) Having my brother Jord abuse me on how fat am I when he checks the seatbelt,
2) Having my other brother Andy force me to his prom, giving me another reason to shape up,
3) Having my father say, you're not fat la....while in fact, he's secretly happy that I'm fat, so that he doesn't have to be fat alone.
4) Having my dear mom being so understanding and supportive meals-wise, and then say: "Why wanna be thin??? You want to get more sick like Miss XXX ar? Tai nyor lo, I never wan to be thin, just normal. So don't you get that idea into your head!!"
To which I cheekily replied: "Too late, I've had it in my head liao!" :P
So I'm going to use this place as a food diary.
Note that all is calculated and custom-made with regards to healthy realistic eating, and BMI.
Before weight: 64kg.
Optimal Aim* : 55kg.
Basic Lifestyle Changes
Wake up at 7am everyday. Sleep at latest 11pm.
Eat a big breakfast. Small lunch, dinner vegan.
Focus on vege and fruits, and protein.
Workout for 3 times a week.
Refrain from icecream and naps, for now.
Remarks:
So far, its working. I'm down to 61kg for now. Have to focus more on overall toning. For the America trip, I'll just have to do the diet thing...
*with realistic aims in 2 and a half months. Maximum losing can be only until 50kg. But that will be nuts.
1) Pig out and parasite in your parent's home
2) Buy and hoad all the stuffs you can get to smuggle back to Aust, the Land Where Everything Is Expensive.
3) Abandon your blog.
4) Be totally antisocial.
5) Be a social butterfly.
6) Speak all the broken English all you want.
You get the idea.
I, for one have accepted a challenge from a dear dear friend who's obsessed with her weight.
Thus we get to LOSE WEIGHT during our holidays!!
But seriously this is playing way outta my favor.
Firstly I have to go through Christmas.
Then a trip to America, where its is FREEZING cold there, as its Summer in Aust, thus the Winter there.And in Winter, you GET FAT.
Don't even think of what those crap the mags tell you about losing weight in winter.
Aaaaaand....there's CNY!!!!
See? No hope liao.
and my friend is spending her hols in Aust, where she can focus without undue distraction.
NO FAIR!!!!!!!!!
On a happy note though, I have the advantage of family support such as:
1) Having my brother Jord abuse me on how fat am I when he checks the seatbelt,
2) Having my other brother Andy force me to his prom, giving me another reason to shape up,
3) Having my father say, you're not fat la....while in fact, he's secretly happy that I'm fat, so that he doesn't have to be fat alone.
4) Having my dear mom being so understanding and supportive meals-wise, and then say: "Why wanna be thin??? You want to get more sick like Miss XXX ar? Tai nyor lo, I never wan to be thin, just normal. So don't you get that idea into your head!!"
To which I cheekily replied: "Too late, I've had it in my head liao!" :P
So I'm going to use this place as a food diary.
Note that all is calculated and custom-made with regards to healthy realistic eating, and BMI.
Before weight: 64kg.
Optimal Aim* : 55kg.
Basic Lifestyle Changes
Wake up at 7am everyday. Sleep at latest 11pm.
Eat a big breakfast. Small lunch, dinner vegan.
Focus on vege and fruits, and protein.
Workout for 3 times a week.
Refrain from icecream and naps, for now.
Remarks:
So far, its working. I'm down to 61kg for now. Have to focus more on overall toning. For the America trip, I'll just have to do the diet thing...
*with realistic aims in 2 and a half months. Maximum losing can be only until 50kg. But that will be nuts.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)